well i think it is sad to noe that those you are familiar working with going off soon.. just had a lunch date with the HO whom i meet on work. a bunch of funny Dr who love to crack stupid and funny jokes and c/o when they are on call or post call. well this lunch makes me realised a thing which i think it is pretty important.. it is time for me to improve on all the medical terminology in order to communicate well with them (ha ha). besides that, need to prepare for their departures soon as they are on a rotation based to other departments or Hospital every 4mths.. sad to know that coz i'm so used to them around me at work.. crapping with me and making fun of my name.. who will have the gut to call me Xu Huixin after they left.
Still remember how Laura and me become friends... well she was the first HO to approach me for my name...how i always make fun of Dr Koh HL with his childish behaviour... plus Dr Wong ST's ID pass..
well 6 more weeks to go.. cherish it..
Saturday, July 22, 2006
Tuesday, July 18, 2006
First time
(Assume you are a girl if you are a boy)
It's your first time. As you lie back your
muscles tighten. You put him
off for a while searching for an excuse, but he
;refuses to be swayed as he
approaches you. He asks if you're afraid and you
shake your head bravely.
He has had more experience, but it's the first
time his finger has found
the right place. He probes deeply and you shiver;
your body tenses; but
he's gentle like he promised he'd be. He looks
deeply within your eyes
and tells you to trust him - he's done this many
times before. His cool
smile relaxes you and you open wider to give him
;more room for an easy
entrance.You begin to plead and beg him to hurry,
but he slowly takes his
time, wanting to cause you as little pain as
possible. As he presses
;closer, going deeper, you feel the tissue give
way; pain surges throughout
your body and you feel the slight trickle of
blood as he continues. He
looks at you concerned and asks you if it's too
painful.Your eyes are
filled with tears but you shake your head and nod
for him to go on. He
begins going in and out with skill but you are
now too numb to feel him
within you. After a few moments, you feel
something bursting within you and
he pulls it out of you, you lay panting, glad to
have it over. He looks
at you and smiling warmly, tells you, with a
chuckle; that you have been
his most stubborn yet most rewarding experience.
You smile and thank your
dentist. After all,it was your first time to have
a tooth pulled.
Naughty, Naughty!
What were you thinkin' ?
PERVERT
I know what you were thinking!
It's your first time. As you lie back your
muscles tighten. You put him
off for a while searching for an excuse, but he
;refuses to be swayed as he
approaches you. He asks if you're afraid and you
shake your head bravely.
He has had more experience, but it's the first
time his finger has found
the right place. He probes deeply and you shiver;
your body tenses; but
he's gentle like he promised he'd be. He looks
deeply within your eyes
and tells you to trust him - he's done this many
times before. His cool
smile relaxes you and you open wider to give him
;more room for an easy
entrance.You begin to plead and beg him to hurry,
but he slowly takes his
time, wanting to cause you as little pain as
possible. As he presses
;closer, going deeper, you feel the tissue give
way; pain surges throughout
your body and you feel the slight trickle of
blood as he continues. He
looks at you concerned and asks you if it's too
painful.Your eyes are
filled with tears but you shake your head and nod
for him to go on. He
begins going in and out with skill but you are
now too numb to feel him
within you. After a few moments, you feel
something bursting within you and
he pulls it out of you, you lay panting, glad to
have it over. He looks
at you and smiling warmly, tells you, with a
chuckle; that you have been
his most stubborn yet most rewarding experience.
You smile and thank your
dentist. After all,it was your first time to have
a tooth pulled.
Naughty, Naughty!
What were you thinkin' ?
PERVERT
I know what you were thinking!
precious moments
i think i have missed the most precious moments in my life.. friendships...
lost quite a bit.. juz a lonely soul currently.. guess it is due to my up down mood that i dunnoe how to get along well with ppl??? dunnoe.. well i guess i can meet those hi bye firends only.. ha ha.. ironic rite.. so well well well.. juz enjoying being alone.. all alone and one alone..
lost quite a bit.. juz a lonely soul currently.. guess it is due to my up down mood that i dunnoe how to get along well with ppl??? dunnoe.. well i guess i can meet those hi bye firends only.. ha ha.. ironic rite.. so well well well.. juz enjoying being alone.. all alone and one alone..
Sunday, June 11, 2006
it juz a false act
a big hug to me which i think i deserved it..
an applaud for myself for putting up such a gd show..
all the laughter and jokes that i cracked for the past week..
i really need to start to admire myself..
again i'm gg back to self in 2002
but now i'm facing it all by myself...
my closest friends are not ard with me... coz they din noe..
others think i'm fine.. yes i'm fine when i'm in a crowd
am i really fine with i'm in the crowd.. the feeling that i asked xuanhong previously was there [a sense of loneliness even though with company]
what my analysis is right... i nv let others to really enter my inner world...
am i really fine??? no i NOT... i need time... i need time to hide.. i need time to let to embrace the remaining things i have.. i need time to bury what i've lost..
i need some silent moments pls stop asking me are you alright when you are 100% ready to be with me...
an applaud for myself for putting up such a gd show..
all the laughter and jokes that i cracked for the past week..
i really need to start to admire myself..
again i'm gg back to self in 2002
but now i'm facing it all by myself...
my closest friends are not ard with me... coz they din noe..
others think i'm fine.. yes i'm fine when i'm in a crowd
am i really fine with i'm in the crowd.. the feeling that i asked xuanhong previously was there [a sense of loneliness even though with company]
what my analysis is right... i nv let others to really enter my inner world...
am i really fine??? no i NOT... i need time... i need time to hide.. i need time to let to embrace the remaining things i have.. i need time to bury what i've lost..
i need some silent moments pls stop asking me are you alright when you are 100% ready to be with me...
Friday, May 19, 2006
01S3B
it had been a long time since i had met this group of lovely and funny people.. had last met some during the past CNY over at cy's place and some during our sentosa trip post Xmas.. but i juz wan to say again.. i still love these people although we are not that punctual in our meeting.
actually this evening i was telling my sis that i was quite sadz that i would be on time for this gathering coz we are not famous for punctuality..but surprisingly cy and zy were early and the rest of them were only 10 to 15 min late esp weilin (most of the time we late for more than half hr). i even told cy that we can made a move 1st as i think weilin will be late for 1/2hr which i was right (bingo!! bingo!!). [previously he had learnt a lesson frm the sentosa trip we had in dec which he was 5 min late but still need to wait for ppl up to an hr, :)].
well i really need to comment this guy.. he also had a very brillant idea and gut regarding certain things.. do you noe how he make his $$ worthwhile for a buffet? he actually suggest throwing all the rice into a hidden plastic bag in order to eat and eat the raw stuffs, and he did do it (only his table).that is y this table can tkae the longest time to eat. veri dai zhong isnt it?
as for my table a grp of gd children, rayner was sharing with us where to get GOOD japanese buffet and his Japan trip. then we moved on to discuss abt some French guys that Weiying, Michele and Ah joo met during their attachment.. ha ha.. funny expression seen in rayner when we are discussing it..
then after i finished "filling" up my stomach, i moved to another table to find my poker kakeys.. i actually surprised fc and jiaming when i shown them my poer cards.. oh boy dun ask me y i bring a deck along.. have learnt my lesson well with them.. we are juz a crazy bunch of Bridging people.. love playing bridge with them even when it was quite obvious that their skills in building a bridge had gone down.. but it's still fun.. ha.:). enjoyed the sessions when we kept misleading each other, guessing who is partner and also finding scapegoat to commit suicide when the cards were quite bad.. it was very fun.. and i often suffered from aspiration when i laughed and drank at the same time, and also almost choked to death when eating my watermelon due to the stupid comment that fengchen made..but it was fun..
Although we din move on for further activity after dinner as most ppl need to work to earn $$ despite Jinying kept asking us to go to her hse to play taboo. it was still lovely to see everyone.. need to emphasize to 01S3B, although the frequency of our meeting had gone down (unfortunately) due to our busy and tight schedules... let's try to maintain such frequency ok.. Shiyun and i dun think that it's a gd as we might deteriorate and end up not seeing each other 4ever.. dun let this happen ok? :)
Need to thank cy for organising it and also Sakae sushi that $40 voucher that we die die need to use before end of this mth.. looking forward for our movie treat.. Da vinci code, Xmen 3.. and more to come..
actually this evening i was telling my sis that i was quite sadz that i would be on time for this gathering coz we are not famous for punctuality..but surprisingly cy and zy were early and the rest of them were only 10 to 15 min late esp weilin (most of the time we late for more than half hr). i even told cy that we can made a move 1st as i think weilin will be late for 1/2hr which i was right (bingo!! bingo!!). [previously he had learnt a lesson frm the sentosa trip we had in dec which he was 5 min late but still need to wait for ppl up to an hr, :)].
well i really need to comment this guy.. he also had a very brillant idea and gut regarding certain things.. do you noe how he make his $$ worthwhile for a buffet? he actually suggest throwing all the rice into a hidden plastic bag in order to eat and eat the raw stuffs, and he did do it (only his table).that is y this table can tkae the longest time to eat. veri dai zhong isnt it?
as for my table a grp of gd children, rayner was sharing with us where to get GOOD japanese buffet and his Japan trip. then we moved on to discuss abt some French guys that Weiying, Michele and Ah joo met during their attachment.. ha ha.. funny expression seen in rayner when we are discussing it..
then after i finished "filling" up my stomach, i moved to another table to find my poker kakeys.. i actually surprised fc and jiaming when i shown them my poer cards.. oh boy dun ask me y i bring a deck along.. have learnt my lesson well with them.. we are juz a crazy bunch of Bridging people.. love playing bridge with them even when it was quite obvious that their skills in building a bridge had gone down.. but it's still fun.. ha.:). enjoyed the sessions when we kept misleading each other, guessing who is partner and also finding scapegoat to commit suicide when the cards were quite bad.. it was very fun.. and i often suffered from aspiration when i laughed and drank at the same time, and also almost choked to death when eating my watermelon due to the stupid comment that fengchen made..but it was fun..
Although we din move on for further activity after dinner as most ppl need to work to earn $$ despite Jinying kept asking us to go to her hse to play taboo. it was still lovely to see everyone.. need to emphasize to 01S3B, although the frequency of our meeting had gone down (unfortunately) due to our busy and tight schedules... let's try to maintain such frequency ok.. Shiyun and i dun think that it's a gd as we might deteriorate and end up not seeing each other 4ever.. dun let this happen ok? :)
Need to thank cy for organising it and also Sakae sushi that $40 voucher that we die die need to use before end of this mth.. looking forward for our movie treat.. Da vinci code, Xmen 3.. and more to come..
Tuesday, May 16, 2006
serious posting
pardon me frm being serious and scary for the previosu post..
i juz need to vent my anger.,
anyway juz came back frm redang few days ago..
will blog that soon..
7 more days to work.. arghz..
i juz need to vent my anger.,
anyway juz came back frm redang few days ago..
will blog that soon..
7 more days to work.. arghz..
Monday, May 15, 2006
beware..
Beware of strangers is something that i have learnt since young..
My mum also emphasized to me regarding this.. coz she always thinks that i've "soft ears"
i understood her intentions and i've learnt...
i've learnt to guard strangers
but there's something i nv learnt well despite of repeated mistakes..
which is i nv learnt to guard those people whom i noe..
true.. that is me who may appear like a kiwi.. but willing to share and help..
but it does not mean that what i share with u esp my worries u can use a loudhailer and spread to others...
mind you.. i trust u that's y i share.. there is no pt for u to misread and blow it up.. it's my worries not urs..
things seems to get worsen u noe...
yes.. i think i understand le..
i will try to watch my words and nt to be truthful at all times...
betrayal will...~!@#$%^&*~
My mum also emphasized to me regarding this.. coz she always thinks that i've "soft ears"
i understood her intentions and i've learnt...
i've learnt to guard strangers
but there's something i nv learnt well despite of repeated mistakes..
which is i nv learnt to guard those people whom i noe..
true.. that is me who may appear like a kiwi.. but willing to share and help..
but it does not mean that what i share with u esp my worries u can use a loudhailer and spread to others...
mind you.. i trust u that's y i share.. there is no pt for u to misread and blow it up.. it's my worries not urs..
things seems to get worsen u noe...
yes.. i think i understand le..
i will try to watch my words and nt to be truthful at all times...
betrayal will...~!@#$%^&*~
Friday, March 17, 2006
drop dead
still dun understand why Mr lim HB wants to have a triple jump for reduced energy.. really kill all my brain cells.. i'm so tired.. wel well well going to take a nap soon.. muz be able to tahan later to watch westside story at 1.30am.. (well again my backgrd music is not doing well again) arghz
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
new bloggie
seriously i think my bloggie and tagboard are being underutilised. ha all thanks to her lovely master..
wonder whether u guys like abt my background music.. yes it's SUMMER SNOW, theme song from the Japanese drama-- Summer Snow (Xia Zhi Xue) filmed in yr 2000. i wonder whether anyone has the impression on this drama..
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Summer 1951....
the first Japanese submarine the "kuroshio" took its first dive off the Straits of Tsugaru.....
when the searchlight shone out from the window into the darkness of the sea...
tiny particles that were like cotton balls were seen....
it was recorded that it was as if it were snow......
I want to see it once....
thousands of meters deep under the sea....
the pure white Summer Snow....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A love story between a young man who has been forced to grow up too quickly, and a young woman with an ailment that has placed restrictions on her life. Natsuo (Domoto Tsuyoshi) has been looking after his younger brother and sister since the death of their parents. He has also been running the family bicycle shop. Yuki (Hirosue Ryoko) becomes the only person in the world in whom he can confide. For Yuki, Natsuo becomes the catalyst that has her trying to break out of her cocoon.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
well, i think i'm not only having the crave for the OST but oso the drama.. OMG..
haiz..hope u all will like the backgrd music.. though it's a bit incomplete. it's the best i can find.. will be uploading all songs that i like fortnightly to share
wonder whether u guys like abt my background music.. yes it's SUMMER SNOW, theme song from the Japanese drama-- Summer Snow (Xia Zhi Xue) filmed in yr 2000. i wonder whether anyone has the impression on this drama..
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Summer 1951....
the first Japanese submarine the "kuroshio" took its first dive off the Straits of Tsugaru.....
when the searchlight shone out from the window into the darkness of the sea...
tiny particles that were like cotton balls were seen....
it was recorded that it was as if it were snow......
I want to see it once....
thousands of meters deep under the sea....
the pure white Summer Snow....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A love story between a young man who has been forced to grow up too quickly, and a young woman with an ailment that has placed restrictions on her life. Natsuo (Domoto Tsuyoshi) has been looking after his younger brother and sister since the death of their parents. He has also been running the family bicycle shop. Yuki (Hirosue Ryoko) becomes the only person in the world in whom he can confide. For Yuki, Natsuo becomes the catalyst that has her trying to break out of her cocoon.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
well, i think i'm not only having the crave for the OST but oso the drama.. OMG..
haiz..hope u all will like the backgrd music.. though it's a bit incomplete. it's the best i can find.. will be uploading all songs that i like fortnightly to share
Tuesday, March 07, 2006
my oTS
got pretty upset today as i couldn't find the cd i wan.. had been to all the possible stores to look for it but juz no stock.. shall i order frm HMV but i was told that it's $67.. i was so shocked when i heard the price.. i dun understand y it's so expensive when Overtime, Long vacation, and pride OST only cost under $30 at HMV.. more than double the price.. WTH.. wondering if i try ordering from gramaphone, will it be cheaper? shall chk it out again.. oh ya.. haven been to tower records to look for it..
dun ask me why i wan the CD.. coz i juz have the crave for it!!
dun ask me why i wan the CD.. coz i juz have the crave for it!!
new look new start
ha.. finally finsih revamping my blog.. nice? i hope so! have spent the entire morning doing it and choosing my blogskin. well at first i want to use 5566 blogskin but i'm jzu afraid that i will give u guys a scare.. ha.
it's so nice not hvaing sch.. i shall continue to nua...
it's so nice not hvaing sch.. i shall continue to nua...
Tuesday, February 28, 2006
Summer Snow..
It's Summer Snow in the deep blue sea
I try to touch, but it fades away
It must be a dream I will never get
Just like my love that's crying for you
If there were something not to change forever
We could feel it deep in our heart
Today is over with a million tears
Still everyone has a wish to live
Oh, I do belive everlasting love
And destiny to meet you again
I feel a pain I can hardly stand
All I can do is loving you
It's Summer Snow in the deep blue sea
I try to touch, but it fades away
It must be a dream I will never get
Just like my love that's crying for you
I try to touch, but it fades away
It must be a dream I will never get
Just like my love that's crying for you
If there were something not to change forever
We could feel it deep in our heart
Today is over with a million tears
Still everyone has a wish to live
Oh, I do belive everlasting love
And destiny to meet you again
I feel a pain I can hardly stand
All I can do is loving you
It's Summer Snow in the deep blue sea
I try to touch, but it fades away
It must be a dream I will never get
Just like my love that's crying for you
Saturday, February 25, 2006
arghz II
well as you guys can see i'm not a frequent blogger... 36 posts in total since i started 18 mths ago.. that's too little rite.. something i do have a lot of things to write but juz that i dunnoe how to pen down. but i do enjoy posting a lot of Chi-na thingy( either i wrote or i read frm somewhere). if you are able to understand them u might be able to noe wat i'm thinking and experiencing.
recently there are a lot of personal and family matters happening around me... as much i wish to pen down.. there are risks in it.. significant others might read it.. arghs.. out of the sudden i realised that i'm a loner in fact. alot of emotional and psychosocial aspects are "running" in me and i do want to "vomit" them out but there isn't an avenue. yes i may seem to have a lot of friends.. but in times of trouble there isnt anyone that i can find and talk with... everyone seems to be so preoccupied with their work and relationships.. i may appear to be a weirdo in crowd.. the siao one who only can be a comedian... the unreasonable one who is extremely picky and fussy in her fyp... but it doesnt mean i'm ok
pls dun rely on me too much.. i'm not a superwoman. pls dun look for me only when u are in need... relationships are not an one-way thingy.. it shld be mutual my dear..
a listening ear and emotional support are all i need now..
recently there are a lot of personal and family matters happening around me... as much i wish to pen down.. there are risks in it.. significant others might read it.. arghs.. out of the sudden i realised that i'm a loner in fact. alot of emotional and psychosocial aspects are "running" in me and i do want to "vomit" them out but there isn't an avenue. yes i may seem to have a lot of friends.. but in times of trouble there isnt anyone that i can find and talk with... everyone seems to be so preoccupied with their work and relationships.. i may appear to be a weirdo in crowd.. the siao one who only can be a comedian... the unreasonable one who is extremely picky and fussy in her fyp... but it doesnt mean i'm ok
pls dun rely on me too much.. i'm not a superwoman. pls dun look for me only when u are in need... relationships are not an one-way thingy.. it shld be mutual my dear..
a listening ear and emotional support are all i need now..
Friday, February 24, 2006
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