Retrospective entry

Finally I had my very own weekend after burning 3 consecutive weekends due to conference, work, inservice and school.. Though this weekend I'm still doing my assignment.. which tried to accomplish a bit but failed.. but at least I manage to do something I like and they are less stressful.. hmm.. what did i done? well i finally manage to meet up with WC on friday for dinner & crap a bit plus watched "Ratatouille". And also met up with Aud, and Geri for coffee and nua-ing in the cafe on sat nitez.. how i wish everyday will be like these.. wat a wishing thinking i had.. well there was a common thing happened for the both nite which was i took the last train back home.. fierce rite.. haha (lame)

The following are some recent events that i was "involved":

1) Raj's Farewell (17 Aug)

Occupational Therapy Team 1


2) Singapore Fireworks Festival (17 Aug)

Always like this nightview of Singapore from the bay...





wow!! my fav. Fireworks..

Wencong & I




3) Rheumatology Workshop @ Conrad (24-26 Aug)

Having the morning tea with my workmates


The only thing I enjoyed during the conference was the food.. and dining area.. ambience was good.. classy.. but a bit stressful when facing at the cutlery..

Function Room for dinner is at the poolside

This is the poolside restroom..

4) Interdept Captain Ball Match (5 & 7 Sept)
Energizer

Da Ge Hong Yun & me...

Tired look.. Lip Chin, Joanna & me!

Mr Adam Keith & me...

David & me...

Victory smile.. moving into the quarter finals

Go Go GO!!!



5) Hong Yun's Farewell (7 Sept)


What's so secretive?

So engrossed in reading

Yeah.. Specially designed farewell gift...

Recent look of me...

特别的位置

每个人这辈子
心中都有过这么一个特别的朋友
可能相爱过， 也可能喜欢着彼此
但是， 却为了什么原因而没能在一起
很矛盾的行为
一开始
你不甘心只是做朋友的
但久了
突然发现
这样最好
宁愿这样默默地关心
总好过在一起而有天会分手

珍惜

有一种感觉叫珍惜
这是一种奇妙的感觉
一种令人感到幸福的感觉
被在乎的感觉
不管结果如何
最重要的是
当下这个人感觉到珍惜

遗忘

如果可以的话, 我希望能忘记过去
以全新的姿态认识你
或许一切会简单多了

Things will not be the same

Today it might seem to be a normal usual Monday, but i guess everyone do feel the same as how i feel, juz that no one do vocalise it. The team is quieter now, and 10AB gym too.. no more lame jokes, no more baby photos and Hp discussions, and my nagging voices... things will not be the same anymore, unless this is wat i felt... i need to admit that i miss that chap. he is not only the colleague, but also a mentor, brother and friend. i like to depend on him when i'm at workplace. he is also my SOS in time of crisis. all these made his departure difficult for me...

i'm glad that he likes that movie clip that i've prepared for him... at least his appreciation made it worthwhile for me sleeping at 4am in the morning in order to complete the gift.

i hope that he is fine at rehab, enjoying his work and continue to make a difference in his patients. plus taking good care of those patients who were previously under my care. 大哥加油！！

A girl.. who simply loves the speed...

When i was young i was kind of different from the girls of same age.. i dont like playing with barbie dolls or masa masa.. playing hide and seek; and catching were always on the top of my priorities... i enjoy running not as in slow jog but it's the hard core spriting... i like the "dash" feeling during the run and also the wind blowing onto my face... And, also i always like to speed up when running downward slope to enjoy the "extra" bit of speed.. not only that it actually allows me to keep my mind off from other things and focus during that few seconds of dashing... and it is a way for me to vent my anger too... i hope i can continue to run like the past.. but i really doubt so based on the recent incidents..

i started to feel the pain on the medial side of my right knee since Apr/May... i thought it was a muscle strain coz i felt it a few times during my track and field training when i was in Sec4, and the dr believed so too... but the pain din go off for weeks... and my physio friend felt that it seems to be a muscle imbalance issue becoz of my gaits. i subsequently went for a running assessment to look at my weight distribution on feet and the results were i tend to over pronate during my run. and a pair of control shoes and knee support were invested. and the pain did went off gradually.. however recently the pain came back when i increased the intensity of sports in a week, and aching pain increases when i redistributed all my weight onto my right for more than 1 min. in addition there seems to be an increase in trip and almost fall incidence rates over the past 1 month. multiple falls occurred during the past 2 days of captain balls and these falls werent mostly caused by collisions. i still remembered that there was one moment when i jumped for the ball, sudden weakness was felt on my right leg, and i fell when i landed. yesterday when i was running from novena square trying to catch up with my teammates after lunch, i had a sense of 力不从心. i found it difficult to do my striding as weakness set in. things worsened during the evening games, despite i wanted to play at least a full half game. my knee basically gave way when i was running and there was a moment that i limp. all the bruises were found on my right leg. a few of my physio friends had asked me not to continue to play, and one of them did explain the consequences if anything happened--- might not be able to do any sports in the future if it is really a ligament issue not balance. i did ponder abt this issue for a while but i decided to continue to play last night as it holds an extra meaning...
it might be rare to see the 3 guys from my dept playing together in the future. 我真得很想最后一次和他们一起拼命。。。 and i did view it as my last game before i consult the dr and get the final verdict. but unfortunately i din get to play much as they were worried that i will further injure myself if i continue to fall.

aching pain is still constantly felt and it increases when i walk more than 10min... planning to see a dr soon.. but fearful of the findings.. maybe ignorance is a blessing.. and i wan to continue to run..

愛情是靠努力的, 如果一切都講運氣, 愛情還有甚麼好感人的?

有种美丽，叫放弃 （‘淘汰’后记）

感激上天让我与你相遇与你别离
生命给了我们无尽的悲哀， 也给来我们永远的答案
于是，安然一份放弃， 固守一份超脱
不管未来的生活如何变迁
不管个人的选择方式如何
跟不管握在手中的东西如何
我们虽逃避也勇敢， 虽欣慰也伤感
我们像往常一样，往生活的深处走去
我们像往常一样， 在逐步放弃
却有着逐步决定

淘汰

淘汰 is one of the songs that I came across when watching one of the Taiwan variety shows.. and it manages to touch me.. There are 2 versions of this song.. personally i prefer Eason's version as i like the way he handled the emotions of the songs..

Eason's version



Jay Chou's Version


如果你愿意再次相信
相信我是爱你的
我会奋不顾身
把幸福都给你
就算
有风也有雨
也要给你
阳光洒满地

My Celebrity Look-alikes

hmm.... do i really look alike....?

羅志祥- 愛＊轉角MV

我伪装着
不露痕迹的想在你身边
静静的陪着看着天边
骑着单车
往前行进着
某个路口爱在等着
你往前走
不回头看了记忆的笑脸
缓缓的敲着我的琴键
我不舍得
让你孤单单的
我爱你的心牵挂着
心不再拚命躲不去害怕结果
假设有个以后你会怎么说
一直想跟你说幸福不再溜走
下个路口你会看见爱
有美丽笑容
爱转角遇见了谁是否有爱情的美
爱转角以后的街能不能有我来陪
爱转角遇见了谁是否不让你流泪
也许陌生到了解让我来当你的谁
我不让爱掉眼泪不让你掉眼泪
现在永远
你就是我就是我的美

Recently this is one of my favourite songs. No special reason for liking it but i guess it's the 'side effect' of the Drama series, Corner with Love, which i recently watched within 2 days.

Tired & Stress

I'm so tired and stress over these few days.. things don't seem to be right and i have a lot of things yet to be settled.. i need to admit that i'm stress and indeed super extremely stress.. not only bcoz of my work and also i'm starting sch le.. but the details and payment have not settled yet..now i wonder why did i start to go back to sch.. i used to be looking forward to sch but now i'm worried.. worried whether i am able to cope with it and my work; and excel in both.. i doubt i doubt.. super no confidence.. all these stress are making me drain out.. very drain.. i'm tired really tired when i even haven start SCHOOL YET!!!! Guess wat i'm doing now.. drinking Kopi-O despite i know that i will suffer from the side effects later.. but i really need an energy booster now... i need to destress but chocolate doesnt help anymore.. last wkend fireworks did manage to help but there will not be fireworks every wkend rite.. sighz.. sadz..

Pissed off

just another episode of feeling unsettled. all things seem to be so off to me... easily upset by my ward nurses for the entire day for things that were not within my control.. why am i so easily swing about by all these small little things.. yucks.. am i trying to be a perfectionalist or juz wanting others to work at my level.. i'm super not right!!!!

等待。期待

曾经的我
一直在期待
期待着心中的结果
却迷失了自己

当期待成了失望
我学会了等待
总是在黑暗的角落
等待一个奇迹
等待一个机会
却蒙蔽了心眼
失去了判断

我讨厌这样的我
于是我拒绝了等待
拒绝了一个我无法承受的过程
或许抱着一个平常心的呼吸
我会好过一点
没有了期待
也没有了等待
我只想要珍惜眼前的一切

你是我心内的一首歌 by 王力宏 feature Selina

A very retro mv background and sweet combination.. simply like this simple lovely song!!

王:你是我心内的一首歌
王:心间开启花一朵
s:你是我生命的一首歌
s:想念汇成一条河
王:点在我心内的一首歌
王:不要只是个过客
s:在我生命留下一首歌
s:不论结局会如何

合:好想问你
合:对我到底有没有动心
合:沉默太久
s:只会让我不小心犯错
王:不小心犯错

s:点在我心内的一首歌
s:不要只是个过客
王:在我生命留下一首歌
王:不论结局会如何


合:你是我心内的一首歌
合:心间开启花一朵
合:你是我生命的一首歌
s:想念汇成一条河
王:想念汇成一条河

s:好想问你王:好想问你
s:对我到底有没有动心
王:对我到底有没有动心
s:沉默太久王:沉默太久
s:只会让我不小心犯错
王:不小心犯错

合:点在我心内的一首歌
合:不要只是个过客
合:在我生命留下一首歌
合:不论结局会如何

01S3B Class Gathering

I've always enjoyed meeting up with my JC classmates despite of the fact that i need to do the dirty work of organising it. It has been 3 months since we last met and maybe it is even longer for those who have been disappearing for a short while. frankly speaking 3 months to me was a bit long.. i remember when we first out of school.. we used to meet mostly every weekend when the guys were in the army.. subsequently at least once a month when the girls started school... when the guys started school we hardly meet up.. everyone seems to be busy with their own things and also their new group of friends..i miss the days that i can sit there quietly listening to the squabbles between jinying, weilin and fengchen; interesting army encounters from the guys; rayner's high-end experience of having fine dining and JAPANESE food!!; shiyun sharing her friends' "stories", and days of playing 'bridge' openly in the public while waiting for the usual latecomers, and not forgetting the famous "open number' to finish up the leftovers!!

Well we no longer play the foolish games we used to play.. Listening to each other's updates, work experiences, and travel experiences are nice too for today's gathering especially Zhenhao is back from his Work-n-travel in US.. I've gotten my last bday prezzie ffor this year from him-- Nike watch (Merge Attract series):-P


Something similar i got but it's in baby blue.. i simply juz love it





Anyway I enjoyed the gathering( esp the praises frm ppl regarding me :P).. i dunnoe when will be the next one especially when i'm starting school soon, and fengchen will be leaving for Korea for 4mths... but certainly i'm looking forward for the next gathering which i guess we will be able to hear more interesting stories from Jinying.. our very own SIA girl when she starts flying soon..
:-P

Having a drink at Coffee Club post dinner

My Buddy.. Zhenhao & me...

Reminiscing

Our very own CT, Mr Ng's Birthday celebration (2002)

Racial Harmony Day (2002)

Dinner & Dance (2002)

Visit to NYJC new campus (2004)

Annual CNY visiting @ Weilin's Place (2005)

Tioman Trip (May 2005)

Crazy Bangkok Shopping Trip (Dec 2005)

fustrated

sometime i wonder whether i'm selfish or not... its seems that i only can see my own problems and relying the rest to listen to my problems. though there was no complaints from any of my friends but i feel that i'm selfish.. self centred. i know that it has been a tough time for me for these few months and i'm too focus in his and mine issues.. and i lean onto my friends too much.. it nv comes to my mind that they themselves also facing a dozen of problems which were unknown to me.. but why do i have the cheek to rely on them.. they are not obliged to listen to me.. why am i loading with them my problems. i'm not that kind as what other think too.. self centred and selfish are all i can describe myself now..

迷失。明白

我想我迷路了
迷失在心中的国度里
我以为你会牵住我的手
陪着我度过
但我从没想过
你的温柔与体贴
却是我迷失的原因
我从没有想过逃离
一直紧握仅有的温柔
以为这一切会有转机
却发现我没有优先权
在你心中我不是最重要的
因为我不会依赖着你
不想因依赖而成为了你的负担
不想你看到你因负担而变成沉重
如果这样会让你快乐一点
我会保持着这不平稳的天枰
因为我明白我不是你的未来
也知道我能自己走出这迷宫
现在的我看开了。。。
我只想珍惜我所拥有的一切包括你这个朋友

NOT ME

I feel that I'm like a deflated balloon now... floating around aimless.. fustrated on little things which i cant help it.. i may not have the courage to cont anymore.. despite how much i care.. as far as i know for this point of time.. i'm exhausted totally.. i'm not the ME that i'm used to be.. i hate the way i am now.. and i know that i'm losing the courage to cont wat i wan to...

My head is spinning

Feeling Gong Gong seems to be an indication of insufficient rest for me.. i thought i was fine after the trip despite the weather was a bit on the cold side... i looked back for the past few days since back home.. i realised that i nv really manage to have a good night sleep.. quality sleep was disturbed by my thoughts and worries, and also dreams.. dreaming of losing someone impt though i struggling to hold onto.. standing at the cliff crying non stop... felt a sense of heartaching when looking at someone drifting away/ apart from me... are all these omens of losing.. or juz that i need a sense of security... seems that i'm not in control of my life... maybe WC is rite in a right.. staying away instead of totally drawn towards may be a better solution to my problem now..

qutoes from 夏雪

“遇到一个爱你的人需要很多的运气，

找到一个你爱的人需要很多努力，

运气是不可求的，

而努力却是可以付出的，

找到一个你爱的人已经很不容易，

还去要求他是不是也爱你就更困难了，

如果遇不到爱你的人那就找一个你爱的人，

这样幸福就简单多了。”

1

2

“每个人心中都有一些遗憾

有时甜、 有时苦

甜的是美美的回忆

苦的却是只有回忆”

1

1

“错过的永远最美，最美的永远错过。

因为错过所以你发现她的好，

然后花了很多时间和精力去重新寻找，

想要弥补那个遗憾，

在这个过程中他在你的心中的份量会越来越重，

到最后错过的就变成最美的、最爱的

也因为这样所以最爱的永远都会错过。

而人总是在追求心中一种遗憾

却忽略自己身边所拥有的东西

如果停下来就会发现其实自己拥有的已经够多了”

Hokkaido

Greetings from Hokkaido.. finally found a free internet access in the hotel. the hotel that lodge in today is built in the middle of the forest and buildings are found among trees with indoor links...cool rite.. haha
Today is my DAY 3 in Hokkaido. so far so gd.. enjoy my life over here.. but i`m still coping with the weather which is totally unpredictable.. it was a rainy day when i first arrived and freezing cold in the evening which my jacket failed to keep me warm.. well i was glad that the weather is gd today.. sunny but yet windy as well.. gd weather for me to see the lavender [ will post up the photos when i`m back]. food was average for the buffet BUT sashimi and the desserts plus choco were gd,,,yet to try the Melon which hokkaido is famous for.. still considering to buy or not coz it`s very expensive approximately more than 1600 Yen(SG 20)...
ok i gtg le.. need to catch my beauty sleep.. hope things are fine in SG....

cHANGI AirPort

Guess where am i now? sighz.. at gate D41 awaiting to be board to JAL 710 final destination to Narita.. sometime it is quite sad to travel with my parents. had to be force to enter the age early to avoid the crowd although i have not shop sufficiently in the transit mall.. T_T but anyway i juz taken a Gelare waffle for my dinner..but it was very filling as my irritating dad ate half of it.. :S ok i shall bear with his childish act for the next 6days
6hrs of night flight now i started to worry whether i will be able to sleep on board or not.. and i still need to travel for another 1 hr to japan domestic airport to take another flight to Hokkaido.. wat a long journey. approximated arrival time to hokkaido will be ard noon..sigh 12 hrs of traveling. i hope that the service from Japan Airlines will be good as it is my 1st time taking Japan Airlines and Japanese are very particulate on their services.. crossing my fingers hard:)
Ok i gtg le... time limit is up soon.. more update if i manage to get network at the rural areas of hokkaido
Sayorana

其实还爱你

其实还爱你by 阿沁
have been seriously crazy abt this song for months le..
dunnoe why i'm so crazy abt it..

finally it's time for hokkaido

Finally I've finishing packing my bag. it took me an entire day, was super ineffective and unmotivated... i guess i was too tired after working on my project till late night on Thurs. it seems to be a busy week for me. met the Ying, aud and Liting for dinner on tues, and watched harry pottter with gretel and rae... plus busy doing my handover and program proposal. i have finished all the necessary for my work but i still felt a bit unsettled.. Going to Hokkaido is a trip that i was looking forward and i thought i will be excited abt it as well.. A trip that i will unwind myself and learn to let go alot of things.. but i noe i will be missing someone. Sighz.. i noe all these shld be erased off in order for me to enjoy my trip.. but 我无法放他一个人。 i know things are hard for him lately, and i have tried my best to help within my limits.. i dunnoe how is he going to settle all things by himself, and i will not be there to provide a listening ear. Am i juz worried or feeling guilty for not able to help.. maybe i shld have burden msyelf with all these..我是人不是神。。。

4 more hours before i board the plane.. i need to get excited.!!!!

真正可怜的人
就是以为失去一样东西
就到了世界末日
如果你愿意去看的话
你知不知道你拥有的还有很多
只是你不愿意去看而已。。。。

“朵馨”

[石头剪刀布]

You are The Empress

Beauty, happiness, pleasure, success, luxury, dissipation.

The Empress is associated with Venus, the feminine planet, so it represents,
beauty, charm, pleasure, luxury, and delight. You may be good at home
decorating, art or anything to do with making things beautiful.

The Empress is a creator, be it creation of life, of romance, of art or business. While the Magician is the primal spark, the idea made real, and the High Priestess is the one who gives the idea a form, the Empress is the womb where it gestates and grows till it is ready to be born. This is why her symbol is Venus, goddess of beautiful things as well as love. Even so, the Empress is more Demeter, goddess of abundance, then sensual Venus. She is the giver of Earthly gifts, yet at the same time, she can, in anger withhold, as Demeter did when her daughter, Persephone, was kidnapped. In fury and grief, she kept the Earth barren till her child was returned to her.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

放逐。自由

突然有想去流浪的冲动
想放逐自己到处流浪
或许流浪能感受自由
被封锁的心也能从而得到解脱

Calla Lily

I used to like white flowers without any particular reason. White Lily seems to be my fav since secondary days coz they appeared to be quite elegant. However Calla Lily has secured a major position in my heart recently partly because they look gentle and delicate in appearance...

佛焰苞花意

或初露，或微放，或盛開，海芋有『佛焰苞花』獨樹一格多變的花形，一朵朵亭亭的立於晴空之下，清麗的姿態，隨著螺旋狀的花瓣捲入花心，說著一種海芋獨有的典雅氣質。

海芋物語
海芋別稱水芋、蕃海芋、野芋、馬蹄蓮。外型簡單而清純，尤其是純白色的海芋就和百合一樣給人有一種清麗脫俗的感覺，所以在英文裡，是以尼羅河百合來稱呼她，在日本則稱她為荷蘭海芋。

海芋象徵著誠實，與良好的同伴關係，很適合用在朋友之間，與幸福婚禮的場合。

問花花不語

花語的頻率與正常的心跳相同。可以數，可以聽，不要問，為什麼。

花語：雄壯之美、潔淨

花形簡單大方的海芋，擁有時髦的魅力，無論和哪一種花搭配，都蓋不住它那獨特且清雅的氣質，也因此而擁有「雄壯之美」和「清秀挺拔」等花語。
清新脫俗、純白可人的海芋，總是靜悄悄地給人們帶來一陣清涼，尤其是在暑氣漸漸逼人的初夏裡，欣賞一下它的清姿，即使再浮燥的心情也會平靜許多。
不同的顏色有不同的意義,分別是: 種類. 花語含意. 白色. 象徵青春活力、氣質高雅. 黃色. 象徵純潔、志同道合. 紅色. 象徵對對方有好感

Happy 23rd Birthday!!!

Today I've eaten my 4th Birthday cake and now I'm older 1yr and 1 day.. Out of the sudden I felt that I am so fortunate as I am being loved by so many ppl... in fact i guess i've been "celebrating" my birthday for the entire Jun ad i guess it will continue to drag till July. Gotten my 1st brithday prezzie from Jessy n co ealier this mth, next a surprise from my lovely Physio-mates during our lunch date, followed by a surprise "party" by my sis n bro-in-law

well sometimes i really 身在福中不知福， frankly speaking i was feeling autistic the night before my birthday. wanted to hibernate so i chose to cancel my dinner date with my sisters gang in JC.. hoping to spend the night alone by myself.. but in the end i regretted for doing so.. lame rite.. :(. the night was actually spent with Tiong n Wencong who were being kind enough to meet me despite being super broke. Nothing special had happened on this day but juz that 有一点遗憾didnt manage to fulfil my 22nd birthday wish. T_T

Anyway, i wan to thank all of the friends and my family for all those surprises and well wishes... i noe i'm being blessed..unless i'm happy and contented...i'm glad to be remembered during my birthday.. And, also special thanks to the Physio ortho n part of CP team who gave me a LOUD birthday song early in the morning in the office.. hey guys u really made my day man!!!Q

good bye 22, happy 23 is here..:)



Wow its a MANGo cake...


making a wish seriously.. wat's up in my mind?


hmm.. yummy cake here i come..





acting cute in front of the durian cake which my sis hates most.. haha

谢谢你让我爱过你

感觉天气冷了
就加件毛衣
而不是急着躲进
某个人的怀里
这么简单的常识
我竟然忘记
直到你离去
才恢复记忆
还可以呼吸
心跳也还规律
只除了寂寞
它还不肯马上就平息
相恋和失恋
如果说都需要练习
一次学会两种也算好事情
谢谢你教会我爱需要两颗心
谢谢你示范了什么人该放弃
谢谢你提醒我痛会唤醒勇气
谢谢你曾让我这样的
爱过你
只要睁开眼睛
就有好风景
再不用苦苦等你
偶尔的好心情
这种简单的快乐
比玫瑰美丽
我相信伤心
会慢慢痊愈

自从认识你，我的喜怒哀乐都跟你沾上边
因为喜欢你，我学会了勇敢地面对好朋友的身份
谢谢你放开我的手， 你的坦白让我勇敢也让我学习放手
此时此刻的我不再会为了你而情绪化
因为我已正视我们的朋友关系
22岁的我曾经是如此向往爱情
但现在的我不再了
你的出现让我从新的认清自己
找到了曾经那么有规划， 那么了解自己所要的我
谢谢你让我爱过你
谢谢你没有把我给推开
谢谢你让我看见了自己
我想我已痊愈了

Quak quak quak..

Today I've have received my 6th MC for the year plus lost my voice for the 2nd time since 2003. Well i din mean having a husky voice but basically it is hard for me to produce a note that can be heard.. was msging Rose this afternoon that the anti-cough herbal tea didn't do its miracle on me.. sobz. however having a second thought, i think i did cause it to happen.. in another word serve me right..
Retrospective data as followed:

I woke up on a Friday morning with a terrible sore throat, instead of seeing a dr, i taken the Ah-Ma traditional method: gurgling of salt water. Had minimal fluid intake during working hrs and straining my vocal cord when talking to the patients with hearing impairment. Attended a gathering after work, and agreed to go to KTV after dinner. Sang a few F.I.R and Jolin songs. Did attempt to strict my self from singing too much and left an hr early before the session.
Went to work on the very next day complaining of insufficient sleep and minimal fluid intake as well... attempted to have a nap over my sis's place while waiting for her hse-warming to start but failed...was screaming at my cousins who kept disturbing and pulling my leg. And also, talking loudly "arguing" to my uncle regarding issues I totally disagreed with. next I had some satays, chicken wings and nuggets to fil up my empty stomach, and had my fav Hoegarden. Last but not least taken a slice of durain cake as a finale...
Woke up this morning wanted to plan my Sunday outing with my mum... And I realised that oh well...i cant produce a beautiful note which i used to.. it's hard for me to make a conversation as well..since 11am I've tried not to pick up any calls coz i'm temporarily mute... 6that's so freaking irritating@@#%$^$
I've taken a MC for tmr but i'm still crossing my fingers hard... hoping my vocal cord will recover for my work.. if not it will be the 6th MC used...it will not be nice to be absent so frequently...

i'm tired

it seems that there are a lot of things in my mind which have been blocking my mental processing... i'm starting to think slower and respond super+++ slow.. am i deteriorating? sometime i wish that i have selective memory loss.. maybe i can be happier when i forget certain things.. at least being sadness that moment and happier for a longer period of time (seems quite a gd idea)i wish i could be happier..but i seems unable to let go things...

new look...

Finally i've settled all the things i need to..
I know it has been almost a yr since i blogged..
Was a bit lazy and tied up by my work.. (i know it's an excuse)
frankly speaking i do have a hard time recalling my username and password
was quite shocked to see that blogspot become so chin-na
anyway getting afresh.. a new look to my blog again..
i hope this time my blogging habit will get better...(crossing my fingers hard)
Some updates for those whom i haven seen for ages
sorry to disappoint those who think that i managed to "fish" a doctor as my bf
well, i'm still single and available.. (will con't to try harder.. hahha)
something new is that i have enrolled to La Trobe offshore deg conversion course.. a/w for my offer letter...
n i shall play hard before Sept comes...

more updates on me soon..oyah plus my tagboard too.
need to turn off the lights soon..
Winnie the Pooh here i come, zzzzzzzz

Departing

well i think it is sad to noe that those you are familiar working with going off soon.. just had a lunch date with the HO whom i meet on work. a bunch of funny Dr who love to crack stupid and funny jokes and c/o when they are on call or post call. well this lunch makes me realised a thing which i think it is pretty important.. it is time for me to improve on all the medical terminology in order to communicate well with them (ha ha). besides that, need to prepare for their departures soon as they are on a rotation based to other departments or Hospital every 4mths.. sad to know that coz i'm so used to them around me at work.. crapping with me and making fun of my name.. who will have the gut to call me Xu Huixin after they left.
Still remember how Laura and me become friends... well she was the first HO to approach me for my name...how i always make fun of Dr Koh HL with his childish behaviour... plus Dr Wong ST's ID pass..
well 6 more weeks to go.. cherish it..

First time

(Assume you are a girl if you are a boy)

It's your first time. As you lie back your

muscles tighten. You put him

off for a while searching for an excuse, but he

;refuses to be swayed as he

approaches you. He asks if you're afraid and you

shake your head bravely.

He has had more experience, but it's the first

time his finger has found

the right place. He probes deeply and you shiver;

your body tenses; but

he's gentle like he promised he'd be. He looks

deeply within your eyes

and tells you to trust him - he's done this many

times before. His cool

smile relaxes you and you open wider to give him

;more room for an easy

entrance.You begin to plead and beg him to hurry,

but he slowly takes his

time, wanting to cause you as little pain as

possible. As he presses

;closer, going deeper, you feel the tissue give

way; pain surges throughout

your body and you feel the slight trickle of

blood as he continues. He

looks at you concerned and asks you if it's too

painful.Your eyes are

filled with tears but you shake your head and nod

for him to go on. He

begins going in and out with skill but you are

now too numb to feel him

within you. After a few moments, you feel

something bursting within you and

he pulls it out of you, you lay panting, glad to

have it over. He looks

at you and smiling warmly, tells you, with a

chuckle; that you have been

his most stubborn yet most rewarding experience.

You smile and thank your

dentist. After all,it was your first time to have

a tooth pulled.

Naughty, Naughty!

What were you thinkin' ?

PERVERT

I know what you were thinking!

precious moments

i think i have missed the most precious moments in my life.. friendships...
lost quite a bit.. juz a lonely soul currently.. guess it is due to my up down mood that i dunnoe how to get along well with ppl??? dunnoe.. well i guess i can meet those hi bye firends only.. ha ha.. ironic rite.. so well well well.. juz enjoying being alone.. all alone and one alone..