Tuesday, September 28, 2004

A life of an occupational therapy student

Had a pretty 'interesting' lecture talking about issues regarding the mid semester evaluation today..[erm.. i think it was more like a confidence boosting session run by the lecturer] ha ha... kinda expected tt he wasn't surprised by the negative thoughts tt r downcasting us but i was rather SURPRISED that he thinks highly on us... 'hardworking batch ever seen, juz dun worry, most of u will definitely pass the exams'...i really wonder.. are all these really come frm the bottom of his heart or juz he is making use of his psychology knowledge to bring our anxiety level down... sighz personally i dun think im hardworking esp when my entire mind is giving 5566 all my attention.. well u can't blame mi for this when it's a form of escape frm reality for mi...

sometimes i really admire the art of boasting this lecturer had, always tries to show off his abilities and also not forgetting to compliment himself indirectly while put in effort to bring up out confidence... but indeed i think he was quite a gd therapist, am i rite pals?? quite clear-minded... can i be like him? well i think it's really need some experience..

i remember he mentioned about the main ingredients that made up a gd therapist today are resilence, confidence and positive thoughts. and indeed i need to admit tt the course, which was originally meant to be 3 1/2yrs but being squeezed into a 3yr course, is really pushing us to a limit that i almost gg to breakdown, juz to make us be more resilent. but also making us to cut down our social life.. sometimes i really feel tt cutting social life issues due to heavy sch work are contradicting some of the OT outcomes for our clients: care for others, possess gd socialization skills, community mobility, isn't it? mugging and mugging all day really limit the above tt i have mentioned to my dearest future OT collegues, and i really find tt i am sorting of drifting away frm my social circle and my JC frenz.... but wat can i do? sighz (-ve thought)..
hopefully by the end of the entire course, i will really manage to obtain the best ingredients of it.... the journey is still long.....

Friday, September 10, 2004

What women said

FINE
This is the word women use to end an argument when they feel they are right and you need to shut up. Never use "fine" to describe how a woman looks - this will cause you to have one of those arguments.

FIVE MINUTES
This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so it's an even trade.

NOTHING
This means "something," and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with "Fine"

GO AHEAD (With Raised Eyebrows! )
This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine"

GO AHEAD (Normal Eyebrows)
This means "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care" You will get a "Raised Eyebrow Go Ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by"Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in about "Five Minutes"when she cools off.

LOUD SIGH
This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment, and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing"

SOFT SIGH
Again, not a word, but a non-verbal statement. "Soft Sighs" mean that
she is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe, and she will stay content.

THAT'S OKAY
This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you back for whatever it is that you have done. "That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and in conjunction with a "Raised Eyebrow."

GO AHEAD!
At some point in the near future, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble.

PLEASE DO
This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance with the truth, so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay"

THANKS
A woman is thanking you. Do not faint. Just say you're welcome.

THANKS A LOT
This is much different from "Thanks." A woman will say, "Thanks A Lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have offended her in some callous way, and will be followed by the

"Loud Sigh."Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh," as she will only tell you "Nothing"

Sunday, September 05, 2004

security

at any pt in my life, i do spend some quiet moment in the middle of the night doing some self-reflection.. n i realise tt security is something i seriously need in my life... often i do feel tt im all alone at a tip of the tower falling n no one is there for mi to fall back...

often i felt tt my presence is kinda redundant as i do appear quite invisible to the rest..my presence is not always being felt and im tired to be so irritating trying to get attention frm others... y can't i be myself...all i need is to have someone in my life to acknowledge my presence.. is this too demanding.. i guess it is demanding..

recently i keep on having this mindset of getting away.. runaway..i guess even i disappear suddenly out of their lives, no one will realise it or bother to find mi as my presence is not significant to them...

???

it has been almost a mth tt i blogged...every1 thinks tt im too busy to blog but it's not true... i was online everyday but i juz refuse to blog. reason veri simple: coz i dunnoe wat to write especially when i had created a mess out of my life tt i dunnoe how i can settle in... this havoc doesn't allow me to really settle down n concentrate in my studies, all i can do it to avoid avoid avoid...i noe i'm in my denial mode...n i noe tt it's not a solution for my problems but currently im not ready to face them and it's the best solution tt i can think of..

sometime i really hope tt i can transform myself into a bimbo who doesnt need to use much of the brain cells and can jus let the neurons died.. i do feel tt bimbo r quite carefree coz they dun think much n worry tt much as their mindset r veri simple n straightforward...i getting quite tired of myself... i hate myself being so jing ming.. being jing ming has become a burden in my life.. isolating my life..but wat can i do....

Saturday, August 07, 2004

Nervous....

less than 5hrs i'll be having audition liao.kinda feeling nervous now. well i juz can't help it even though i have some experience in joining some small scaled singing competition before but that was in sch. and somemore this time ard the criteria will be stricter and there will be hundreds over participants... (to me quite big scaled leh..) Goosh.. juz by thinking of this, my heart pumps even harder now.

frankly speaking, even though i seems to be quite ai xian, i do suffer from stage fright.. and it kinda worsen by years. i still remember the first time i went on stage for my 1st singing competition final in school. i sang " Xin bu Liao qing" tt time. the 1st half of the song was a disaster coz my voice was trembling and some of the keys i couldn't reach. luckily seeing my classmates at the audience seats cheering for me.. at least i regained some confidence and the rest of the song i did it well and gd.

based on my memory the worst stage firght i experienced was during my drama nite performance during J2. that was really terrible.. i remembered 2 hrs before the performance i had a very terrible breakdown. i was crying crying nonstop alone at one wuloo corner in the school... nxt during the "kai sheng" session with my teacher-in-charge, i juz felt fatigue and had a veir bad diarrhea. and i oso suffer frm dyspnea and keeping on puking.. all these stopped mi frm having a gd performance tt nite.. din meet the normal "level" i had always..

well wat will happen today? i oso dunnoe.. kinda quite scary to go alone... hoping that there will be someone accompanying me and give me some support but based on my character and upbringing i dun really wanna trouble ppl and i dun wish to be seen as mafan. can i be strong? i dunnoe.. i wanna be strong! but can i? why am i always putting a brave front in front of ppl?

Saturday, July 31, 2004

What is Marketing?

You see a gorgeous girl at a party.
You go up to her and say, "I am very rich. Marry me!"
That's
Direct Marketing


You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl.
One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says,
"He's very rich. Marry him."
That's
Advertising.


You see a gorgeous girl at a party.
You go up to her and get her telephone number.
The next day you call and say, "Hi, I'm very rich. Marry me."
That's
Telemarketing.

You're at a party and see a gorgeous girl.
You get up and straighten your tie; you walk up to her and pour her a drink.
You open the door for her, pick up her bag after she drops it,
offer her a ride, and then say, "By the way, I'm very rich "Will you marry me?"
That's
Public Relations.

You're at a party and see a gorgeous girl.
She walks up to you and says, "You are very rich, I want to marry you."
That's
Brand Recognition.

You see a gorgeous girl at a party.
You go up to her and say, "I'm rich. Marry me"
She gives you a nice hard slap on your face.
That's
Customer Feedback

Blessing

Have you ever wonder what exactly is blessing? What does blessing really comprised of? Definitely the meaning of blessing varies from person to person. For instance, to someone who is very poor but filled with loves from others may envy a rich man who is very lonely, and even considered that as a blessing, whereas the rich one will think in another way. Someone without a hand will always consider those who only have a hand as a blessing because they have the opportunity to touch and feel with their hands, and even use them in writing. However those who have one hand only will always view themselves as unfortunate because they are always comparing themselves with the fortunate ones with both hands without thinking of those who do not have upper limbs. For those with both hands will view having fine and soft fingers as a blessing. Innate greediness in Man causes us to be unappreciated and not contented towards what we own, thus resulting in one’s unhappiness. Will Man stop to be greedy? I doubt so. Not try to be pessimistic, but the impact of the materialistic world have indeed cause Man to forget about the beauty of contentment. Isn't it true? Man hardly will be contented about their achievements. They will also try by all means to get themselves to great heights but the question is: Where is the highest point in one's life? No one know. In another words, they will never realize whether they have hit the peak or not.

When was the last time you feel contented or appreciate for what others had done for you? Have you show your appreciation to that person? It's a blessing to have someone in your life who is willing to lend a helping hand to you regardless whether they are only by-passers to you. Pls don't take them for grant. By saying a small little 'thank you' with SINCERITY can really brighten up one's day and allowing one to know that his help is being appreciated.

Friday, July 23, 2004

Journey

It's a long long journey
Till I know where I'm supposed to be
It's a long long journey
And I don't know if I can believe
When shadows fall and block my eyes
I am lost and know that I must hide
It's a long long journey
Till I find my way home to you

Many days I've spent
Drifting on through empty shores
Wondering what's my purpose
Wondering how to make me strong
I know I will falter
I know I will cry
I know you'll be standing by my side
It's a long long journey
And I need to be close to you

Sometimes it feels no one understands
I don't even know why I do the things I do
When pride builds me up till I can't see my soul
Will you break down these walls and pull me through

Cause It's a long long journey
Till I feel that I am worth the price
You paid for me on calvary
Beneath those stormy skies
When Satan mocks and friends turn to foes
It feel like everything is out to make me lose control

Cause It's a long long journey
Till I find my way home to you to you

 
Music/ Lyrics: Corrinne May

Sunday, July 18, 2004

4/4 class gathering

juz came back frm my sec class gathering... at first i was quite worried coz afraid tat they will start teasing mi but it seem like ,y worries were redundant'.. kinda quite getting a bit high upon seeing some of them, coz i haven been seeing them for ard 1 1/2 yr...kinda interesting to hear the 'news' abt them and see their changes especially the guys.. like CBL becomes less crappy n quite.. i think he's getting more mature n predictable, steve slim down quite a lot but still quite fair after all, guanhao oso slim down but become fairer (did he go n bleach himself?? strange din the sun do the tanning for him?).... wat abt mi??
 
 
almost every1 was late for the gathering(ha. i think is the style of 44 lahz.. yeah..ha) then we went KTV (seems like i had been gg to tat particular KTV at orchard recently, but the songs had been updated again ha)n i finally found n 5566 song that fully fit into my vocal range (not too low ha ha)..
 
 it was a new experience gg to ktv with diff bunch of ppl... like today i din really had the chance to choose the songs tt i wanna sing, coz the moment i  got hold of the controller, Koh had really choosen 60 over songs liao (of course he got help the rest to select songs, but he choosen the majority)... actually i was quite piss of with him esp when he ignored my request for my songs n was unwilling to look for mi.. (hey i'm still a ger ok?!) so most of the time i was singing others' songs.. but he was veri funny too as the songs that he chose esp those sang by the ger, wasn't for himself to sing exactly. in fact he wan us to sing the songs... "specially dedicated for us to sing" but he din really realise that wat he wan dun really fit to wat we wan...haiz.. the guys oso veri paiseh to sing in front of us, esp CBL who is so afraid to gg off tune. though they noe how to sing the song, but they refused to sing using the mic in front of us (r we tt scary? i hope not) after all my hong pian, i finally get Hao to sing(yeah!!) n not forgetting Neo too.. but too bad, i wasn't able to force yao to sing... kinda sympathize them for spending their precious time to listen our "sha ji-ing"( ha) vocal..
 
aniway it's a fun experience to be with them again.. hope tt our nxt meeting will not be another 2 yr later.. ha ha

Sunday, July 11, 2004

5566

hey.. wonder whether any1 of u have watch the NKF charity show for the children medical fund... even though i'm a fan of 5566, but i feel that the organiser is veri biased. can't they think of other participating artistes... i understand 5566 can help them to roll in more $$ for the children and is considered a veri impt icon in S'pore. but try to recall , over the past charity shows is there any artistes who need a special video clip to intro them...No!! there isn't any..
i just feel that it's not fair to the others who dun haf such privileges..

excluding wat i have mentioned earlier on, in fact i was quite high while watching their performance (i try veri hard to suppress it) even though they were lip-synching when sing [Easy come Easy Go]..
BUT.. they sang their new single live... {yeah} they really sing it live as they haf change some of the lyrics and this song is supposingly sang by all the artistes frm Jungiery which includes K1, RnB, Cyndi... n if u paid attention to it at the beginning, u will realise that Xiezhi wasn't in time to sing the 1st few words of the 1st line n Renfu's voice suddenly went softer when he tried to manipulate his mic...

actually not i wanna complained again.. i seriously think that Xu Mengzhe shld try to be more daring in his singing.. when he was singing his lines, u can hardly hear him.. n somemore lack of feelings...
n y muz Mr cao do the rounding up while 5566 was still singing... i hardly can hear his singing...(sob, sob)Nvm.. looking at the brighter side... i'll be hearing it on 8Aug again.. seems like i will b seeing them in a mth time n they shld b coming again in Sept for the [S'pore Greatest Hits award]...

wow they seems to be veri busy lehz..
Upoming schedule of 5566
ard 23-25 Jul gg to Beijing for MTV Awards
8 Aug coming to S'pore for concert at the bay
28 Aug Taipei Concert cum Renfu's Bdae
Oct/Nov filming a new drama series cum releasing a soundtrack
Jan 2005 release of the 3rd Album

meanwhile they still need to do the filming for their variety shows and gg forautograph sessions fo their concert and Mengzhe n Shaowei still busy filming their drama.

As a fan..i can ONLY give them my blessing
hope that everything will go smoothly n they will be in a pink health

Ten If and One But

Friday, July 09, 2004

Cloudy day...

i always thought that i've changed thru the past 1 1/2yr since graduated frm Jc. at least i shld be more hardy than before.. but reality proved mi wrong. i will nv be like others who can treat things lightly. hiccups in life really have a great impact in my life...
it hasn't been a gd day fro mi since tis morning..
1) woke up late for lesson
2) feeling so inadequate in lessons
3) mood is seriously affected by some responses frm XX

I always thought that i can ignore my feelings and treat things as per normal. but can i? i doubt so... to others i always someone who have a lot of self-confidence and is happy-go-lucky person. but is that the real mi? I want to be strong and add more colors in my life, but can i?

Thursday, July 08, 2004

Moooo

todae the weather was so fantastic... rainy and cloudy(tat's my fav weather).. how nice it will be if i had a chance to laze in my beloved bed with my Pooh Bear pillow...too bad tis morning the lesson started at 810am.{haiz tat's reality}
Despite of the cooling weather, I was quite awake for the entire day (yeah i din dozed off during lessons) however I started daydreaming in my land of fantasy when Dr Param lost mi while he was speeding to finish the lectures on time. haiz.. Stupid leh. y can't i be more attentive..[*yuck*]...can someone help...
actually hor, i do consider today as a pretty gd day coz finally after a long long wait.. there is a switch in class rep.. yeah, finally i am not responsible for anything liao(hooray)[*muack*]. and this is y today i have the mood to do something to my blog (notice any changes.. nope?? i added my frenz' links, it was taught by audrey)!!

how i wish the nite will last longer, so that i will have more time to construct my blog n somemore i am so relunctant to go for the class at 8 tmr morning...(HB's lab session, doing palpation in swimsuit,eeeeeeeee)
haiz REALITY!!

Tuesday, July 06, 2004

crazy...

arh........... having a blog can be so mafan especially when i have forgotten all my HTML commands....driving mi crazy soon.. i shall stop the construction today.. will try to finish it up when i am free....
can any kind soul help mi doin it. yucks...

It's My 1st Time..

Yoz finally have my own blog liao after thinking for such a looong loong time...(really veri long..)definitely it will not be toooo personal but an outlet for mi to utter RuBBISH!!...I really need to grumble in order to distress... or else sooner or later i will be gg to the chalet near my place. instead of counselling others, i will be counselled by other psycharists...

Actually setting a blog really can be a big head event.. juz by thinking the title itself.. i still need my buddy zhenhao's help.. n yingbuff's advice.. but end up i decided to give it a crappy name which is not even found in the dictionary(heck CARE lah!!).