love story..

juz finishing watching the movie that channel U had shown. though it is pretty slow in tempo.. but i really love it.. (well i juz love romance show esp those involve ghost factors in). i guess is the love btw the leads attract mi the most.. simple but yet touching.. (hmm.. does it mena tt this is wat i'm looking for?)..



"cherish the time with ur lover before u lose it and regret...."

wait long long

juz came back frm the diagolue session with the minister of health. kinda quite bored as it was suppose to start at 11.30am but the super veri in-puntuality guest was late... and i was told to be there at 1045am.. in the end waited for 1hr 15min.. was a waste of time.. juz for an hr i was actually finish watching 1 video clip in my comp. this mean that i can clear another 256MB off my comp.. waste my time and enrgy and my comp space.. arghz.. but i managed to ask him a qns regarding the possiblity of having a degree course for OT in Singapore with my super kou Chi speech again. luckily he noe wat is OT and currently Spore is only offering a dip course.. in fact i found his reply rather [Fu Yan] coz he mentioned that ultimately we will be having but they r doing it slowly by having the nurising deg 1st at NUS and the new medical sch at SGH.. i noe we have to wait.. but i dun think there is concrete plan yet...sadzz...i'm dying to see the increase in the no of OT in the hospital setting so that there will be more time for the pt and provide them with a beta care (pls wait patiently!!)...

after the session, me and Ira went for the healthy buffet taht was provided.. yah indeed veri healthy.. all the cold food (plus they do not taste gd as well)..the lunch was horrible.. seeing all the ugly s'porean behaviour.. yuckz.. well i shall not mention abt them i guess everyone will roughly noe wat i'm trying to say.. well i'm gg off for my dinner liao.. or else my mum will be killing mi soon.........

:)

confused...

i really find that it's hard to please everyone.. i want to have a nice environment where everyone is happy but how can i do.. something i juz wanna put my pt across in a straight forward manner.. i nv like to beat ard the bushes.. sigh.. having a hard time trying to repharse nicely.. haiz.. i'm not that eloquent tt i thought.. sighz.. y can't one be straightforwardz instead of putting a false front and be nice to someone tt one dislike.. sometime i mind to have conflict but itmust be constructive!! help help.. why muz i please someone when i can;t even please myself...off to sch now.. back to the joyful, mischievous galz. all prepare to go to celebrate buff's bdae...

Is it time to let go??

finally i enjoyed my first early day since back to sch from attachments.. in fact the aim in staying at home instead of gg out is to clear the 100 over video clips that are in my computer and they are causing my com to lag.. however i din manage to watch anything since i'm back home at 1 plus. first i was searching for the OTTP 1B case study for the pre-yr 2 as they needed them for their triple jump. nxt i was helping them so filter out some references and type them out for them as some need them urgently for research. then clearing the mess that i have created juz now.. finally when i have the time to watch the video clips.. goosh i juz can't focus not even on my 56 shows.. my mind was juz wandering ard..

In fact wat Michelle had said last night had a great impact on me. ever since then i have been pondering abt it and there were a lot of flashbacks at the same time... actually wat she said is true. I shldn't be keeping still and just want for a change. I need to move on. i know that i am not in the era which the girls have no choice in their relationship matters. I know i need to be ASSERTIVE and fight for myself.. but thinking in another way, wat do I have for me to fight? I dun possess the qualities that he is looking for at all. being one of his close girl friends in his early sec life, i certainly know that he likes girls who are gentle, pretty, sweet, not as competence as him and slim.. looking at these, i dun even have a stand. may be you may be thinking "that's his secondary sch mindset". i admitted that i used to think that i have a chance as his some of his friends and his ex-classmates after my secondary school days kept on giving false hopes by telling mi that he liked mi but bcoz of his buddies who don't really like mi, he didn't dare to put his friendship at risk. in fact he did give me false hope too-- for no reason he came to my place and gave me 2 cds... but now i can really tell u i really stand no chance. my hopes are shattered after a rare casual sms conversation 2yr ago.. shld i juz admit that i am a failure in life?? yes i do.

as aud has said, everyone has changed, esp when both of us haven really been meeting since sec 4 and i might not like the way he is now.. why shld i keep entangling myself with it. i know it's time to let go... i need to move on but i did try to come out of it.. i always that i have managed to let it go whenever i had a crush on someone or when i had a boyfriend.. but due to my occasion accidental meeting him on the street, i realised that they were just substitutes.. they just happened to have some similiarities with him. and dunnoe when he has been a yardstick in my heart. i know that it's bad to say that but i can't deceive myself. at the end of the day, he occupies a greatest portion of my heart.

i am satisfied just to have his news from our common friends, i just want to know whether he is doing fine or not.. i dun wish "reappear" in his life and cause a major havoc out of it. as for myself, i understand that i'm not ready to accept any relationships until i really know that i have let go of it. i dun think i will be that daring as compared to my younger days.. i really have no courage now.. all i can do is to hope that happiness will always be with him.

First song

Gathering

juz came back from OT gathering at marche.. it was so fun..but i haven had a chance to ask thida regarding my BURNING qns in my mind (gals, can help mi ask during chalet??). i nv noe tt the lecturers are so gossipy. always trying to spectacular who with who. are we that interesting? or rather should i said are we so entertaining?? juz wondering what will be their reactions if we ever caught them gossiping about us.. surprise? or blank look? well it's up to our imaginations.. well today's gathering really made us have an in-depth understanding about Michelle and ALSO the unknown side of our OT lecturers. I nv thought that HB will have such an active social life, and enjoyed disco night when he was young (from his looks now, he really can package himself man!) as far as i think, he might not be a good dancer now but indeed a good RETRO dancer (coz it's SAturaday night FEVer).. i kinda expected CM to be veri interested in our private life esp the appearance of thida' bf, BUT not HB... i noe tt when guys get veri gossipy, they are worse than gals (based on the chinsese high boys). but i nv in my life will relate HB to gossipy.. NEVER. i swear...i think i will definitely faint one day seeing him gossiping with others.. Oh mine!!!


Yeah it's us!! The OT!!


Marche!!